Breathe

Ok, if I’m being honest, I planned on writing this a month ago, when this shift was all still a bit new and we were only at the start of it. Yes, I am writing an article of relevance to Corona - I am sorry. Yes, I know I had All this time to write!, well guess what, I bloody well didn’t, did I. Instead, I let myself breathe. Ever thought of that, breathing? Yeah yeah, I know you’re breathing, but this is different - breath made of sleepy sunlight, warm waves. Being still for more than maybe a minute, letting all those tumbly ideas crowded at the top of your mind settle.

Let me tell you how it goes.

Ok, stop: steady yourself still now, wait to find that silence. You may not find whole silence, void of all movement and life, just the silence where you can hear the nuances of your surrounds is what we’re after. Shut those eyes and give it a minute, now what can you find: bird song, dull traffic, crying babies, the bustle of breeze among the branches beyond your window? I’m always surprised by the people and places I find while I wait for the silence, you never notice who’s there, or where, ‘til you’re not.

Now tell me, what do you feel? Reach further, think slowly ok. Start at the bottom, do you feel cold timber beneath your bum? Or soft linen in bed? Fine sand beneath your feet? Do you feel dripping  bathers, clinging heavily to your skin? Your hair, hanging down your spine? Dad’s denim jacket, rigid, engulfing your shoulders. What do you feel, what meets your body right now? Notice even the simplest of stuff. Is the elastic of your underwear a bit snug, are your earrings against your neck, is there a pimple poking sorely at your chin, do those blisters sting, is your pony tail too tight? Think closely, closer than before.

We’ve touched on two senses, let’s ponder the rest. What do you taste, or smell? Is the mint of this morning’s toothpaste still fresh, hot tea lingering there on your tongue, that summery scent of sunscreen maybe, or Mum’s incense floating beneath your door?

Now, when ready, move your mind from the silence of your surrounds, to the motions you feel within. Ask yourself, what’s been on your mind. If you’re stressed about submitting your next assessment, check why. Are you worried you won’t finish in time, you feel like you’ve done a shit job? Listen to the thoughts that arise, watch them sit there on the surface and don’t push them out. Give them time to settle, to loose their weight and heat. Once they have, check what else has been up. Are you mad at yourself for all the time you wasted today? Or upset about all this fucking loneliness? Me too. Well, whatever it is you feel, let it move, let it be heard and hold it. Check, does it have colour or texture, is it sitting anywhere in your body especially? That sounds a bit strange at first, but trust me, and check. You might find heavy, orange fear, at the base of your throat, rolling slippery waiting to be spoken. Do not try to quiet it, however loud it is. It will hush itself soon, just give it a chance to unfold. 

Just one more tid-bit: gratitude. Count just a few precious things, what today made you smile, wonder why? Me dogs woke me up with the warmest of cuddles, and for that I am ever-grateful. I saw on owl perched stealthily down the street tonight, on my walk round the neighbourhood loop. Made me smile. 

Now, breathe. Let it rise, let it fall. Does that feel good? Feel that smooth drumming rhythm in your chest, paced evenly, in no rush at all. Notice, your face soften, your eyes rest gently, the drop of your jaw. Maybe you’ll let your shoulders fall, unloading the tension of all that time where you never seemed to breathe deep. Big sigh, big cry, whatever you need, let it go, let if fall right out. Loud sing, loud dance, move freely from now, fall asleep, doze off to sweet dreams. You’ll feel back home in your body, your bones unburdened with the depth of new breath. 

This little practice is something I picked up a few years ago. I’m not too sure how or why, but bloody hell does it make me feel good. I know it all sounds funny, considering I really just told you to breathe. And I know it sounds a bit hippy dippy, but it’s easy and just takes a minute every now and then. I love to give myself a moment at the end of a hike or after a beach swim to take it all in and let it all out. Give it a few tries, it feels a little more natural each time and after a while it feels pretty wicked to find so much from simple silence and stillness. I know, some people might just label this as mindfulness or meditation, which it is, but you don’t have to think of it like that. It’s just a few steps to find a pocket of zen amongst the madness of the world. A lot of the power comes in as you begin to dive with your thoughts of the moment. Taking a minute to no longer push away what’s there, prevents us from prolonging its presence. It sounds like common sense but do you ever truly try this? There’s plenty of evidence explaining the impact of just sixty-seconds; this article gives a basic explanation, and while there is far more legitimate research available, I find it easier to take it as it is and not get technical with this idea. There you sit, still, silent, listen, feel, taste, smell, what’s there? Move within and repeat with thought. Breathe in, out. Give thanks. Simple, I told you. 

The reason I write of this now, is the conflict I see in having so much time; we’re told we can either be incredibly productive, or lazy af. We all know this modern world has an unhealthy obsession with productivity, and success, and achieving, and striving, and thriving, and blah blah blah. We also know it’s dangerously easy to rewatch South Park, get pissed with ya ‘rents, and slip into a Netflix induced coma of Doritos and sleepless nights in that dark little bedroom of yours. But right now, the best place to be, might be in between. Where you listen to your intuition and follow where it leads you. A bit o’ this, a bit o’ that. Interestingly, scientific connections have been found between meditation practices and subsequent increases in intuition and creativity. Pretty sick if you ask me. So take a minute every now and then to check in if you’re doing ok. This of course is a pretty good habit to hold when life’s normal and everything’s swell, but it takes a little more significance now, when it’s easy to float away into a stagnant, oooor nonstop mind.

Written by: Matilda Reid

Art By: Kyuss Reon